After another day out in the garden doing a variety of tasks. I’m making steady progress. I have cleared dandelions from between all the paving stones. I’ve swept, weeded and dug. Tied up bamboo canes to support sweet peas, and in readiness for runner beans and peas. We’ve planted seeds, made a den, hung washing out on the line and been for a picnic. I decide to take another full stop.
Its been warm and sunny today so I turned to face the warm afternoon sun and simply stand soaking up the rays.
As I stand quietly, I become more aware of my balance and how I’m leaning slightly forwards. I allow myself to include the support from my heels and notice how I start to rest backwards.
As my heels absorb more of me, I notice my backside can stop gripping (even slightly) and there is a subtle shifting tide of muscle releases in my feet and legs. I become aware of my knees, slightly bent. I wait and watch. The warm sun attracts my attention on the whole front surface of my body, inviting a melting sensation all over.
I notice ease radiating through me.
I allow myself to return to my full natural stature, without force or striving. Ah now my knees play with tensions and releases. First one knee can unlock, leg straightens, without force. Then the other one. A deep breath arises on a sigh. Legs are connected to the diaphragm via the psoas muscle. Less leg tension = less breathing tension. Standing tall. Less tense. Standing and being.
I’m not trying to get anywhere or do or fix or manage my experience. I’m curious to see how I unfold and unfurl when the busy-ness stops. I actively wish to allow this. And that is all.
No trying. No shoulding. No forcing. No expecting.
Simply being. Simply standing.
But not still. Never actually still. There are subtle shifts of movement from my breath which have implications throughout me. Its a pleasure to experience the wonder of my human organism returning to my fuller natural state.
Yes – keep being, keep allowing freedom, keep allowing ease, keep allowing myself to be just as I am.
Lucy Ascham is an Alexander Technique teacher who delights in simple moments of self-awareness and self-actualisation.
